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Kiwi authors’ secret revealed

I have long been asking what it is it in New Zealand water because in such a small country they have good number of a high calibre internationally-published authors.

Now I know. Kiwi authors’ secret has been revealed.

It’s not what they put in the water, it’s WHAT THEY PUT IN THE MILK.

Kiwi authors' secret

When supermarkets have this chocolate milk in stock, queues form right around the supermarket. Supermarkets put limits on how many bottles per customer. They still run out in record time.

Now, security guards have been employed to guard New Zealand’s best-kept secret.

I’m serious.

John Anthony and Emma Whittaker said:

Security guards have been employed to monitor supermarket fridges containing Lewis Road Creamery Fresh Chocolate Milk as customer demand continues to froth over.

Since the chocolate milk went on sale three weeks ago, demand has been so great that customers are queuing up for fresh deliveries, purchase limits have been put in place at supermarkets, and security guards are being employed to watch over fridges containing the chocolate gold.

There’s even a black market for the milk, with with bottles sold for upwards of $30.

So. Helen Lowe, David Hair, Elizabeth Knox et al: your secret is out.

I hear there may be plans for a coffee-flavoured milk once they’ve mastered supplies of chocolate-flavoured milk.


Nalini is an award-winning writer and artist as well as managing editor of Dark Matter Zine.


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