A review by Silkie
When my pack sat down to watch TV the other night, I lay beside Human Number 1, leaning against her, while I watched the movie with them. They put on Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 3. Cosmo, the Russian cosmonaut dog from decades ago, is the Most Important Character (MIC). She is beautiful, a Golden Retriever/Labrador cross like me, only she’s a russet brown.
Trigger Warning: a two-legs calls her MEAN WORDS. Over and over again. It was very sad. I was sad* for Cosmo who is a Good Dog.
(* Editor’s note: Silkie understands the TV is not real. Noises, upset people, yelling and so on, much worse than what would make her hide in real life, don’t worry her. Silkie is a smart dog who understands it’s not real.)
The humans who made Guardians of the Galaxy do not understand what it takes to make a good movie. More Cosmo, who stole every scene she was in, and more four-legs – even more of the other ‘animals’ – would have made this a better movie.
The Guardians of the Galaxy franchise focuses on Peter Quill, a human, as the ‘central’ character. He’s ok I guess, especially when he declares Rocket, an ‘uplifted’ [eye roll] animal, to be his best friend. But you don’t see Peter Quill rescuing all the animals, do you? He’s a bigot! Whuff!
The [human’s] review
I loved Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 1, not as a ‘good movie’ but as a fun movie with a kick-ass soundtrack, the kind of feel-good experience I’ve returned to, time and again. Admittedly largely because The Minion wants to rewatch, but I bought the soundtrack back in the day because It Rocks. Vol 2 lost that feel-good feeling and the sound track wasn’t memorable. And yet they tried to work in the soundtrack as ‘a feature’. Meh. It’s ok, nothing to write home about.
The Christmas volume
The recent Christmas movie was fun although not an ‘OMG you MUST watch this’ story. And I adore the first and very very “wrong” Christmas song. The final Christmas song was just gooey and ‘normal’, a bit of a fizzer if you ask me. Would have been better if everyone joined in and sang the first song but I guess it’s part of a well-worn traditional Christmas plot evolution.
Vol 3 the music
The music is a bit ‘meh’. They try to make a feature out of it like in Vol 1 but it doesn’t work for me. Music blends with the story but at no point does it steal the show nor does it create an ‘oh wow’ moment for me. It’s ok. And yet they tried – again – to make the music a feature. I’m betting sales of the soundtrack were spectacular for Vol 1 and they’ve tried to recreate that money-maker ever since. Oh well.
The [human] verdict
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 3 recaptured the feel-good fun of Vol 1 while expanding the cast to include heart-melting characters like Cosmo and her little sub-plot. I’d watch this movie again just for her. (I realize the original Cosmo was supposed to be male but Maria Bakalova (Borat’s daughter Tutar Sagdiyev in Borat Subsequent MovieFilm), the voice actor, is female. Perhaps Cosmo is a they/them?) Lots of fun overall, with applause-worthy character development.
Also, for Cosmo to replace Groot as my favorite Guardian is quite a feat. It used to be Groot then Rocket then Drax. Now it’s COSMO ALL THE WAY. Trailer below so you can get a whiff.
James Gunn wrote and directed Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 3 before leaving Marvel for DC. He says Eagley’s appearance in Guardians is the first official crossover between franchises and teases more to come in the Peacemaker TV series. (Suicide Squad II is, effectively, the pilot for the TV series and I just discovered I forgot to write a review of the TV series, sigh.) Gunn teases more on Eagley BUT he appears to need control of and to take credit for all the things. Therefore, apparently, Peacemaker is on hold until Gunn finishes trashing what’s gone before and starts ‘afresh’ with his new superman. Sigh. I guess teamwork isn’t considered a virtue by some.
Written and directed: James Gunn
Starring: Chris Pratt, Chukwudi Iwuji, Bradley Cooper, Pom Klementieff, Dave Bautista, Karen Gillan, Vin Diesel and many more.
Stolen by: Cosmo the space dog, her voice actor Maria Bakalova, and Cosmo’s CGI team
Running time: 2 hours 30 minutes